Vulnerability although necessary is an emotion most of us attempt to steer clear of mainly due to our own internal insecurities, fear of failing or being judged.

So it shouldn't be a surprise that vulnerability often takes courage as it forces us to step outside of our comfort zone forfeiting our control to trust in a person, process or situation foreign to us, all the while hoping the outcome will be positive.

So how does one cultivate the ability to be vulnerable?

SPEAK UP, own it and admit that you are struggling or need help.

Acknowledging how we are feeling is key in allowing yourself to be vulnerable and plays a part in both our personal growth and in improving our connections as with others by opening up, seeking help and or relaying how we are feeling at that point in time.

BE HONEST, many of us struggle with this and either hold back or choose not to say what it is we are feeling or need out of fear that we may insult, anger or upset someone.

Our interactions should be authentic and relaying the truth doesn't mean being insensitive, so be sure to frame it in the positive.

Honest feedback is a growth point, it allows us to reflect on what has occurred, review what we did well and what it is we can do better.

REMAIN GROUNDED, be present in that moment when the anxiety kicks in, deep breaths and allow yourself time to recenter and slow down.

Resist the temptation to avoid instead provide yourself with permission to sit with the feelings of discomfort to own then and work through it.

Remain focused and ground yourself as much as needed, this process can help to decrease anxiety and rebuilds our sense of control.

ROLE MODEL long gone are the days where vulnerability was viewed as weakness, instead particularly in workplaces it is an expectation that Leaders lead by example to encourage their teams to respond with the same honest, integrity and humility allowing staff to seek clarity or communicate when an error has been made by viewing it as a learning process which in turn creates a safe and empowering space to work within.

So, like anything else learning to become vulnerable is a process and will take practice and time to allow ourselves to become more comfortable with our vulnerabilities.

You may also find that you struggle to overrule your anxiety to avoid situations that require you to be vulnerable.

Know that this is normal and recognizing this is a step in the right direction whereby you can reach out and seek professional help through a mental health professional.

As, its more than likely the anxiety and avoidance is an automatic response kicking in which is your defense mechanism which takes time to supersede.

Engaging a trained mental health professional allows for objectivity and will help you navigate these responses to allow you to replace them with healthy responses and behaviours.

• Kym Marsden is an accredited mental health social worker in Queensland